What Was Best
by TashaAnnMarie
Summary: A One Shot about a decision Peyton had to make. Brucas involved as well.


Disclaimer: I don't not own any of the One Tree Hill characters only the characters I have created myself just for the purpose of this story alone. Thanks!This story has a rating of K and is just a One Chapter. I was just feeling the urge to write this. I haven't wrote too much so hope it comes out okay.

I pulled my car up to the church that was surrounded by cars. I parked where I might not easily get noticed. I sat staring at the church doors, waiting. I needed to see it for my own eyes. I can't believe this is happening.

About ten minutes later people start walking out and stand around the door. I know the time is coming; my heart is beating so hard it is all I can hear.

Suddenly the church doors burst open and out walk the bride and groom. Of course they looked great just like a perfect couple they are. Lucas looked so handsome in his tuxedo, his blonde hair short. Not like it was when we were last together. Brooke looked just like a princess in her elegant white dress and her dark hair piled on her head in curls. People began throwing rice as they walked down the steps towards their limo. They were grinning ear to ear, stopping and hugging people as they went. They stopped before they got into the limo. Lucas bent down and opened his arms and that's when I got my first look at her. I could hear her from where I was parked yell, "Daddy!"

"Emma!" I heard Lucas say back as he picked the little girl up.

The little girl I had pictured so many times in my mind looked just like I thought she would. Her blonde hair was long and curly. Lucas held her tight and kissed all over her face. I could see how much the two loved each other. After getting kisses from her daddy, I heard her scream, "Mommy!" Emma reached out for Brooke who took her from Lucas and showered her with kisses as well.

My heart broke a little at this sight, yet I continued to watch. I wiped away the tears that had escaped from my eyes.

After Brooke showered Emma with kisses, Karen came over and took the little girl. Lucas and Brooke waved bye to everyone and got inside their limo. I watched as the limo drove off, a sign "Just Married" was tapped to the back window. I watched the limo until it turned off and could no longer be seen.

Turning my attention back to the crowed, I quickly spotted Emma running around chasing an older little boy and an older little girl. I could tell the little boy was James, Nathan and Haley's son, he looked just like Nathan. I assumed the little girl was Lily, I hadn't seen her in so long. They continued to chase each other around until Haley came and rounded them up.

I watched as everyone loaded up and drove off. I watched as Emma and Lilly got in Karen's car and headed off into the direction of Karen's house. I sat there for a long time afterwards, just thinking and going over the screw ups that were my life.

Starting the car I drove to the Rivercourt, where we all used to hang out while the guys played ball. I got out and walked over to the picnic table setting my drawing pad down. Before I started to draw I looked around at the deserted basketball court and could picture everyone together right after graduation. Playing ball and writing our names on the court. That was the last time all of us were together. Boy, had things changed since then. Pulling myself out of my trance I looked at the empty sheet of paper and began to draw.

I was so into my drawing that I didn't notice how dark it was getting. I looked at my watch and realized I had been here for an hour and a half. Putting the finishing touches on my picture I loaded my stuff up and headed to Karen's house.

Once I got there, I quietly got out of my car and snuck over to where Lucas's room used to be. Peeking in the window I could tell that it was no longer Lucas's room. The room was bathed in purple. Sleeping in the bed against the wall was Lily and Emma.

I reached in my pocked and pulled out the key to Lucas's door that I had kept from when we dated in high school. I hoped it still worked. As quietly as I could I unlocked the door and crept in the room.

I walked over the side that Emma was sleeping on. I leaned over and gently pulled her blanket up around her, tucking her in better. Tears filled my eyes as I looked at the sleeping angel before me. I moved a stray stand of her curly blonde hair out of her face and said my finally goodbye to her. Leaning down, I kissed her softly on her forehead. She stirred a little bit but never woke up.

I took the folded up picture I had drawn and a note out of my back pocket and placed it on the nightstand next to her. I knew Lucas or another adult would find it. I glanced at her one more time before escaping out the door into the night.

The next morning Karen Scott went in to check on the girls and was surprised to find something next to Lilly's bed. She unfolded it and was surprised to find a note and a drawing of Lucas in his tuxedo holding Emma, father and daughter smiling at each other. It was from the wedding yesterday. In the corner of the picture P Sawyer was written. Deciding it was none of her business to open it Karen took the drawing and note and hid it until Lucas and Brooke get back from their honeymoon.

TWO DAYS LATER

Lucas and Brooke were glad to be back from their honeymoon. They had a really good time, but both had missed Emma terribly. Once they had got to Karen's they rushed to the little girl and showered her with hugs and kisses.

Once the reunion had calmed down a bit Karen took Lucas to the side.

"Honey, I need to talk to you for a second, alone."

"Okay mom, what's the problem?"

"Peyton was here."

"What?"

"She must have snuck in sometime during the night of your wedding. I never saw her and neither did the girls. But she left a drawing and a note."

"Where are they?"

"I hid them in my bedroom. I wanted you to look at them and decide what you wanted to do before Emma saw them."

"I would like to see them."

"They are in my dresser drawer, the top one on the left. You go I'll keep everyone busy so you can take your time." Karen said, squeezing Lucas's hand gently before walking away.

Lucas went in his mom's room and opened the drawer. He pulled out the folded pieces of paper and sat down on the bed. He gently unfolded the paper and was surprised at the picture he saw. It was of him and Emma right after the wedding. She had been there? Setting the drawing aside he unfolded the note and immediately recognized Peyton's handwriting.

My dearest Emma,

I remember the day I found out I was pregnant with you; I was shocked to say the least. I had just returned to L.A., I had spent the Christmas with your father in Tree Hill. We had decided to go our separate ways but not before being intimate one last time. Your daddy will explain what being intimate means when you are much, much older. Anyways, I was sort of heartbroken at the time. I was still in love with your father but I knew he never really loved me the same way that I loved him. I knew the real reason he had broke it off was because he never fell out of love with Brooke. I really wasn't mad at him, deep down I knew him and Brooke were meant to be. But as you'll learn when you get older sometimes we can't help but be a little selfish. Even if we know we could just wind up hurting ourselves more in the long run. When I first found out about you, I was so confused. Abortion was never an option, I didn't even consider. The debate going on in my head was whether or not I could be a good enough mother for you. I, for the first time, completely understood why my birth mother, Ellie, had decided to give me up. As soon as I found out about you, I had this strong maternal urge to protect you and give you what would be best for you. I was so undecided that I never told your father that I was pregnant with you. I was afraid to be pressured in anyway. However, when it came time to deliver you, I felt so guilty. Your father deserved to be there with you the day you came into this world. You were born at 2:15 am, after 13 hours of labor. They wrapped you in a pink blanket and handed you to me. I remember crying so hard, I could barely see your face. I checked and made sure you had all your fingers and toes. You were fine, more than fine. You were quite possibly the most beautiful baby girl I had ever seen. I could see your resemblance to me but your eyes and mouth are your fathers. That night I kept you in my hospital room the whole time, holding you, talking to you. It was then that I knew what I had to do. I was too screwed up to be your mother. I could barely afford to feed myself, as well as provide you with everything you might need. I know your father was no more prepared than I was; he was even less prepared not even knowing you existed. But your dad is one of the best people I've ever meet in the whole entire world and I knew he would make sure you had everything you might possibly need. So the day we were released, I purchased a plane ticket back to Tree Hill. I called for a cab and went straight to your Grandma Karen's house where your dad still lived at the time. I made sure to pack a diaper bag with everything you would need for one day, a copy of your birth certificate and a letter I had received from a lawyer I had called the day after you were born releasing all of my rights to you. I apologized over and over to you and told you how much I would always love you. I carried you over to the doorstep and rang the bell. I've relived this moment so many times. Brooke answered the door and I could tell she was shocked to see me there, especially holding a baby. I asked if Lucas was here and she said yes. Your dad came to the door. When he saw me I could tell he was confused as well and than he noticed you. His mouth dropped open, before he could get a word out I handed you over to him and dropped your diaper bag on the ground. "She's yours Lucas. I love her to pieces but I'm not good enough for her." I said, and turned around and ran back to the cab. I could hear him yelling my name until the cab was gone. I got right back on a plane to LA. I never cried so hard in all of my life. The people on the plane looked at me like I was crazy but I didn't care. I never stopped thinking about you in the years to follow. I never tried to find out how you were doing, I knew. I knew deep inside of my heart you were happy. The only reason I decided to contact you now was because I found out the heartbreaking news that I have cancer. It has spread rapidly and they have little they can do for me. I remember what it was like getting to know my birth mother and I didn't want to deny you that. I may never get to met you but I wanted to leave you a little something to hopefully satisfy any curiosity you had about me. When I pass on, my music and art stuff will be sent to you. You can do with them whatever you please. Music and art have always been a big passion of mine and I have a feeling you'll be the same way. I hope you'll have a fulfilled life and never feel alone the way that I felt when I was a teenager. I know with Lucas and Brooke as your parents you will never feel unloved. I think about you all the time and love more than you could ever know.

Love always,

Your mom

Peyton Sawyer

Lucas wiped away the tears that ran down his face. He folded the note and drawing back up and put them in his pocket. When they got home he would put them some place safe for Emma to have when she would be old enough to understand. With that he got up and went back to join his family. The family he loved to more than anything and he would always be thankful to Peyton for giving him that.


End file.
